the real and the...not so 'real'

i strongly believe that we remember only those things which makes sense to us, that which we are able to associate to us and our beliefs. one such thing i remember studying is the 'Real self and ideal self' by Carl Rogers. recently i learnt things i didnt know about myself. that was when i got reminded of his theory. he says that the 'real self' is what we 'actually' are and the 'ideal self' is what we 'think' we are or rather what the society expects out of us which we think we follow. But when we believe we are our ideal self, it doesnt mean that we are denying or being hypocritical, it means that we are just plainly ignorant.

when you realise the gap which exists between your real and the ideal self then you are in trouble mister. this is the state introspection brought me to. in the given circumstances i could do nothing but face the real me. how do i handle it?

Quite a few times i have had these close encounters with my real self and it has been a harsh reality to accept indeed. but now i know i will slowly come to accept it no matter what it is.

so, i know that the real me is not as 'nice' as the ideal me (after all the 'nice' part itself comes from what the society thinks is acceptable right) now what do i do? i ve got two options, one is to get bogged down and say "oh god this is the real me, i am bad". that would be disaster. i would end up losing my self esteem and feel like loser. the other option is to accept the real me and say "ok so this is how i am" and rationalise whether according to 'me' this is acceptable or not, whether this would hurt my loved ones in any way and then, either change myself for the better or just care a damn about the whole issue and just move on with life.

for now i ve chosen the last option. that doesnt hurt me in any way and am just plain happy this way.